Es que originalmente en el enlace salía que a Miss sorda de Texas la había atropellao un tren.

La Patrulla de Carreteras de Arizona (EEUU) tropezo con un monton de metal derretido empotrado en la ladera de un precipicio junto a una curva de la carretera. Los restos se parecian a los de un accidente aereo, pero tenian aspecto de automovil y no se habia informado de ningun accidente aereo en la zona.

Un laboratorio reconstruyo la historia. Parece ser que el conductor haba conseguido de alguna manera una unidad JATO (Jet Assisted take off: en realidad simplemente un cohete de combustible solido) que se utiliza para dar una empuje extra a los aviones militares de transporte pesado para despegar desde aerodromos cortos.

Nuestro heroe condujo su auto (un Chevrolet Impala) al interior del desierto y encontro un largo tramo recto. Entonces engancho la unidad JATO a su coche, entro dentro, cogio velocidad y encendio el dispositivo de motor a reaccion. Los policias estimaron que el conductor del coche encendio el cohete a una distancia de 5 km, aproximadamente, del lugar del choque. Alli, el asfalto estaba quemado y derretido.

Alcanzo el empuje maximo en menos de 5 segundos, con lo que el Chevy alcanzo velocidades de mas de 550 km/h y continuo a maximo empuje durante unos 20-25 segundos adicionales, el conductor, que no era piloto, habria experimentado lo mas parecido a las fuerzas gravitatorias que normalmente estan reservadas a los pilotos de cazas F-14 bajo una post-combustion completa, basicamente le provoco quedar inconsciente durante el resto del suceso.

El vehiculo siguio sobre la carretera durante aproximadamente 4 km, de 15 a 20 segundos, antes de que el conductor aplicara y quemara completamente los frenos, reventara los neumaticos y dejara marcas de goma sobre la superficie de la carretera.

Llego a volar durante otros 2 km, impactando en la ladera opuesta del precipicio a una altura de 40 m, dejando un crater negro de tres pies de profundidad en la roca. La mayoria de los restos del conductor no fueron recuperables; no obstante, se extrajeron fragmentos pequeños de hueso, dientes y cabellos del crater y se quitaron fragmentos de una uña en un trozo de escombros que parecia ser un trozo del volante.

A fellow from Michigan buys himself a brand-new $30,000 Jeep Grand Cherokee for Christmas. He goes down to his favorite bar and celebrates by tossing down a few too many brews with his buddies. In one of those male-bonding rituals, five of them decide to take his new vehicle for a test drive on a duck hunting expedition. They load up the Jeep with the dog, the guns, the decoys, and the beer, and head out to a nearby lake.

Now, it's the dead of winter, and of course the lake is frozen, so they need to make a hole in the ice to create a natural landing area for the ducks and decoys. It is common practice in Michigan to drive your vehicle out onto the frozen lake, and it is also common (if slightly illegal) to make a hole in the ice using dynamite. Our fellows have nothing to worry about on that score, because one member of the party works for a construction team, and happens to have brought some dynamite along. The stick has a short 20-second fuse.

The group is ready for some action. They're all set up. Their shotguns are loaded with duck pellets, and they have beer, warm clothes and a hunting dog. Still chugging down a seemingly bottomless supply of six-packs, the group considers how to safely dynamite a hole through the ice. One of these rocket scientists points out that the dynamite should explode at a location far from where they are standing. Another notes the risk of slipping on the ice when running away from a burning fuse. So they eventually settle on a plan to light the fuse and throw the dynamite out onto the ice.

There is a bit of contention over who has the best throwing arm, and eventually the owner of the Jeep wins that honor. Once that question is settled, he walks about 20 feet further out onto the ice and holds the stick of dynamite at the ready while one of his companions lights the fuse with a Zippo. As soon as he hears the fuse sizzle, he hurls it across the ice at a great velocity and runs in the other direction.

Unfortunately, a member of another species spots his master's arm motions and comes to an instinctive decision. Remember a couple of paragraphs back when I mentioned the vehicle, the beer, the guns and the dog? Yes, the dog: a trained Black Labrador, born and bred for retrieving, especially things thrown by his owner. As soon as the stick leaves his hand, the dog sprints across the ice, hell-bent on wrapping his jaws around the enticing stick-shaped object.

Five frantic fellows immediately begin hollering at the dog, trying to get him to stop chasing the dynamite. Their cries fall on deaf ears. Before you know it, the retriever is headed back to his owner, proudly carrying the stick of dynamite with the burning 20-second fuse. The group continues to yell and wave their arms while the happy dog trots towards them. In a desperate act, its master grabs his shotgun and fires at his own dog.

The gun is loaded with duck shot, and confuses the dog more than it hurts him. Bewildered, he continues towards his master, who shoots at man's best friend again. Finally comprehending that his owner has become insane, the dog runs for cover with his tail between his legs. And the nearest cover is right under the brand-new Jeep Grand Cherokee.

Boom! The dog and the Jeep are blown to bits, and sink to the bottom of the lake, leaving a large ice hole in their wake. The stranded men stand staring at the water with stupid looks on their faces, and the owner of the Jeep is left to explain the misadventure to his insurance company. Needless to say, they determined that sinking a vehicle in a lake by illegal use of explosives is not covered under their policy, and the owner is still making $400 monthly payments on his brand-new Jeep at the bottom of the lake.

Jet Assisted Take-Off
1995 Darwin Awards Winner
Confirmed Bogus by Darwin
The Arizona Highway Patrol were mystified when they came upon a pile of smoldering wreckage embedded in the side of a cliff rising above the road at the apex of a curve. The metal debris resembled the site of an airplane crash, but it turned out to be the vaporized remains of an automobile. The make of the vehicle was unidentifiable at the scene.

The folks in the lab finally figured out what it was, and pieced together the events that led up to its demise.

It seems that a former Air Force sergeant had somehow got hold of a JATO (Jet Assisted Take-Off) unit. JATO units are solid fuel rockets used to give heavy military transport airplanes an extra push for take-off from short airfields.

Dried desert lakebeds are the location of choice for breaking the world ground vehicle speed record. The sergeant took the JATO unit into the Arizona desert and found a long, straight stretch of road. He attached the JATO unit to his car, jumped in, accelerated to a high speed, and fired off the rocket.

The facts, as best as could be determined, are as follows:

The operator was driving a 1967 Chevy Impala. He ignited the JATO unit approximately 3.9 miles from the crash site. This was established by the location of a prominently scorched and melted strip of asphalt. The vehicle quickly reached a speed of between 250 and 300 mph and continued at that speed, under full power, for an additional 20-25 seconds. The soon-to-be pilot experienced G-forces usually reserved for dog-fighting F-14 jocks under full afterburners.

The Chevy remained on the straight highway for approximately 2.6 miles (15-20 seconds) before the driver applied the brakes, completely melting them, blowing the tires, and leaving thick rubber marks on the road surface. The vehicle then became airborne for an additional 1.3 miles, impacted the cliff face at a height of 125 feet, and left a blackened crater 3 feet deep in the rock.

Most of the driver's remains were not recovered; however, small fragments of bone, teeth, and hair were extracted from the crater, and fingernail and bone shards were removed from a piece of debris believed to be a portion of the steering wheel.

Ironically a still-legible bumper sticker was found, reading
"How do you like my driving? Dial 1-800-EAT-SHIT."